Monday, September 7, 2009

Now that's a lunker!


Couldn't come up with any new ponders off the top of my head this morning so I decide I'd go do my favorite activity for pondering. This morning it involved using a little Chug Bug off the wharf. Well even though I wasn't hit by a ponder, I was hit by a nice bass. I was having a hankering for some fish with my lemon juice tonight. Ahhhhh. Life on the river. Nothing's better.

189 comments:

jan said...

Hi Carol,Good lookin fish. Its amazing that you are right there on the river where you can do one of your favorite pasttimes. I didn't care much for fishing when I was younger.I wonder if I would like it now. From the way you talked in an earlier ponder sounds like you have fishing down to a science.

Carol said...

Well Jan I have spend most of my life just pondering fishing. Dreaming about it, reading about it, and shopping for it.

I have had several boats but being a girl, I couldn't just hook them up and go fishing. I needed someone to go out with and most of my friends couldn't schedule time off at the same time I was off or they just didn't like to fish.

When schedules did happen to coordinate, my boat had set up for so long I needed a new battery and a tune up. I would spend a fortune just getting it ready. I would guess that each fishing trip may have cost me from $300 to up to $800. That's a lot to pay for a few fish.

I finally got the camp four years ago and what....along comes hurricane Rita and kills all the fish for a good ways up the river. Again I wait.

When the river started to heal, I was afraid to leave my bass boat out here because a big rain could sink it if I wasn't here to bail it out. I bought a little porta-bote. A small plastic portable boat I thought I could woman handle. It needed a trolling motor and heavy battery. A neighbor built me a davit to lift the battery in the boat. That boat, with the trolling motor, just didn't move fast enough.

Finally I got my neighbors to build a platforn where I can keep my bass boat and build an addition to my wharf. I'm finally, after all these years, ready to fish. Nothing can stop me now. I have a lot of catching up and catching to do.

jan said...

Well, after all that trouble getting stuff together so you could fish, its great you now have it all out your front door. I guess at this time in our lives, we have to figure out what gives us the most happiness and sounds like fishing does that for you. For me its swimming and not having to commute to do that. I started swimming in about 1980 when I first lived here. Swimming calms me and its a place and time I can let my mind go free. I like the solitariness of it. I live now just a mile from the university pool and I can walk over there any time I want to swim. I love to quilt too and have all the things I need to do that. I also like to walk and live in a safe place to do that. Of course, living close to family is a must. So life is pretty good.

Carol said...

Do you keep in touch with Corky?

jan said...

Corky's daughter, Stephanie, moved here shortly after Katrina and lived here for 2 years. She is my Goddaughter. I attended Corky when she was in labor with Stephanie. Corky came here to visit once (that I know of) while Stephanie was here - but we don't write or call or anything. So, no I don't have contact with her.

Anonymous said...

"Ivy, I would love a bear story and look forward to seeing the pictures of the bears. The bear symbol means a lot to the Navajo. I can't remember if the bear symbolizes good health or longevity - I think it is one of these. I have several necklaces with bears that a lovely Navajo lady sold to me. I always feel good when I wear one of them."

Jan, I saw your post at the end of the last thread, and it made me curious as to what a bear does symbolize. When I looked it up, I mostly found that it symbolizes power, strength and endurance. ThIs American Indian site also added leadership to the list.
Bear symbolizes power, strength and leadership." http://www.ffcais.com/indian-symbols.html

I also really like bears (not face to face, of course). Here's a great picture of a 'Friendly Bear" http://tinyurl.com/kq9vsl

Maybe Ivy will fill us in on more about bears, when she gets here.

Anonymous said...

Carol, I'm determined to figure out how to get this site to do url links. I did it once on a blogspot blog, but can't remember how.

Jan, Do you know that you can copy and paste the http address up in your address window and enter, in order to see the link? I'm only asking, because a lot of people over on trailmix didn't used to know that.

Ivy Green said...

I need to form the habit of checking back to the earlier threads for "add on" comments. It is always such a pleasant surprise to see more additions to threads I thought were "done."

I had purchased a carved bear-fetish for "Bear Woman" during our Arizona trip last November. I gave her that for Christmas. The stores in Scottsdale were beautiful and full of exquisite Native American creations, but what I absolutely enjoyed most was pulling off impromptu at roadside "trading posts" where the Native artisans made and sold their items. I love making a personal connection with the artists and learning "their story."

Carol said...

You can do a hyperlink on a New Post. There is a little symbol for it. You can even copy and paste but you have to do it in the edit mode. On the comments it won't do it.

Carol said...

Would my coming face to face with a black bear while in a pack tent in the Smokie Mountains qualify me to be a bear woman? Nah, I would rather be Owl Woman. Ok, ya'll have to come up with your animal name.

Ivy Green said...

Chloe, I WAS skittish about being only 15-20 feet from a mama bear and her nearly-grown cub. Especially when "Husband of Bear Woman" decided it would be more amusing to open the screen slider for an "unobstructed" view. As he said, "like the screen would have stopped them." True enough.
Actually, the bears were interested only in the corn that was scattered about the yard, and couldn't have cared less about us. Mama did not like the sound of the camera shutter however. She gave me a hard mean stare for that. No pictures of her baby allowed.

Carol said...

Jan, aren't you 1/16 Navajo?

Ivy Green said...

Carol, "Bear Woman" is qualified because she LIVES with them. I consider myself more as "Scared of Bears Woman."

Anonymous said...

Carol, I'm going to go back to that American Indian site, and see if I can come up with an animal name. But I really think I'll be some kind of cat. (Maybe even a barracuda, who knows)

Ivy, I've always thought it was a pleasant surprise to see an addition to an older thread too. I've been known to add comments on older threads also, when I don't really want to bring whatever it is over to a new thread.

Ivy Green said...

Carol,

I am "Spider Woman." Ironically, I acquired that name 20 years ago, long before Charlotte appeared on my back deck. Another story...

Anonymous said...

Ivy, I mentioned yesterday that I never 'completely' trust any animal (I could probably add 'human animal' to that also :).

But, most of all, never mess with an animal that has her young with her. I've seen motherhood completely change an animals personality while their babies are young. They go into a 'protect my babies with my life' mode (which I am sure we can all relate to), but with animals its not always reasonable, especially those in the wild.

Anonymous said...

Spider woman, that's a good one Carol! We could even call you Charlotte.

jan said...

Chloe, You are right. I looked up the meaning of the bear symbol too. The Navajo woman who has sold me several bear necklaces said Good Health or longevity. She might have thought these were important to me. I like power, strength and endurance even better.

Anonymous said...

oops, Ivy is Spider woman, I missread.

jan said...

Carol, I am part Cherokee like many others from Oklahoma.

Anonymous said...

I thought about that Jan. But you could equate strength and endurance to good health and longevity too. I wonder if bears have an exceptionally long life?

jan said...

I want to be "wolf woman"

jan said...

I looked it up. Black bears can live as long as 30-40 yrs but average life span is 18 yrs.

Anonymous said...

Ok then, I copied a few interesting ones from that site (after getting sidetracked with lunch):

Owl symbolizes being wise and nighttime, as well as good hunting skills.

Deer symbolizes speed sacrifice and a protector of the home.

Turtle symbolizes long life and annoys coyote. Slow but steady.

A Pair of Hummingbirds symbolize devotion and are tough fighters. Small but strong.

... but no cats.

But I think I'll be a Panther. I just love the cat personality characteristics.

Anonymous said...

If I've got it straight:

Jan is wolf woman

Ivy is spider woman

Carol is owl

I'm Panther

Ivy Green said...

"annoys coyote"

I thought that was the roadrunner's job. That's funny.

Ivy Green said...

Solar must be the coyote.

solarcrete said...

Im not playing this game. I refuse to give my self a name that all of you pinks can call me....Panther women indeed HA.!

I have barked at the moon quite a few times tho......awooooooooo

solarcrete said...

Ps, If you must call me something: just call me Sr.

solarcrete said...

Oops, that's Sir....haha

solarcrete said...

Sr. Sir is fine too....see ya later

Carol said...

You know that bass in my pic this morning? He's swimming in my stomach right now. I think I had the big culinary O. I think it is better than the other one but who can remember.

I've been fishing off and on all day, between boat traffic. I filleted all my catch then came in a broke out the new deep fat fryer I bought yesterday and fried those babies up with some french fries. That one bass was more than I needed.

I even caught two red fish. They are salt water fish.

I like your animal names. I guess Solar doesn't want to play. Oh well.

Did you guys read that book Divine Secrets of the Ya Ya Sisterhood and Little Alters Everywhere? I just loved those books.
Rebecca Wells is from Louisiana ya know?

Carol said...

Did you also see that owl also has a soul of the dead symbolism. I keep running into dead souls with the stuff I like. No wonder Maggie stays under the bed, probably hiding from ghosts.

jan said...

Carol, after reading your ponders about death - it seems the owl suits you.

jan said...

I have been reading about wolves. An author named Clarissa Estes, who wrote, Women who run with the wolves, says that wolves are a union of opposites and contradictions. I like that.

jan said...

I am La Loba

jan said...

Carol, The fried fish sound yummy. I miss your cooking. Do you remember cooking eggplant parmagiane in our Houston dorm room?

jan said...

Chloe, panthers symbolize strength, power, beauty & courage. Another source says feminine power & protection.

Carol said...

Nope, I don't remember the eggplant parmagiane. Are you sure that was me? I seem to remember eating a lot of those Night Hawk frozen dinners.

Anonymous said...

jwayland said...

I am La Loba
September 7, 2009 6:15:00 PM PDT

Ooh, I looked that up: 'The She-Wolf' ..... I like it.


Jan, Maybe I should have just been Cat Woman. This is what I found on cats:
Cats as protectors. They symbolize strength, cunning, agility, aloofness, independence and seeing spirits. I think maybe to Panther is a little to 'tough' for me. I'm just not that scary (unless I'm really mad).

I found a site with symbolisms that I like better http://www.wicca.com/celtic/wyldkat/wkland.html

Carol said...

Ivy, your scared of bears reminded me of a time when I was out on my nurse friend/river rat's pontoon boat. He is a cool guy but has a tendency to drink a lot of beer and be little lax at being prepared/safety. One day he ran out of gas, didn't have a paddle and had to use a fish net to paddle back home.

I am a worrier. I come by it honestly because my mom was pathologic with it.

Well the entire time we were out on the boat I was worrying, I wonder if he has enough gas, did he bring a paddle, what if we run out of gas and a thunderstorm comes up, etc. At about that time he says, everyone must pick an Indian name. My name quickly came to mind. It was "running scared".

Anonymous said...

They didn't have Carol's owl on the list, but they did have Ivy's Spider woman, and Jan's Wolf (She Wolf, I should say).

Spider: Spiders are weavers and tricksters. They symbolize fate, female energy, creative energy, female energy, wisdom, creativity, new life, entanglement, caution, divine inspiration, starting a project, becoming pregnant, being industrious, warning signals, illusions. they can act as hazard ahead signposts. They are connected to Neith, Ishtar, Atargatis, Athene, the Fates, the Norns, Holda, Inktomi, Kokyangwuti, Tsitsicnako and Sussistanako.


Wolf: Wolves symbolize family, teaching, co-operation, insight, stealth, strength, leadership, loyalty, freedom, individuality, psychic energy connected to the moon (hidden wisdom), sharing knowledge and wisdom, cunning, hunting, seeking, introspection, listening, magick, dreams, They are connection to the moon and to Wepwawet, Zeus Lycaeus, Apollo, Ares, Mars, Silvanus, Cernunnos and Odhinn.

..... very detailed descriptions, as you can see.

Carol said...

Chloe since you can see spirits, can you see any dead souls around me?

Anonymous said...

No Carol. Not a one.

Anonymous said...

Is that disappointing?

Anonymous said...

Hey Carol, Don't worry about it. I can't see those kinds of spirits. Just souls. Live ones. Intuitive like a cat.

Nite.

Carol said...

Nite. any of ya'll read the ya ya book?

Anonymous said...

Hey Carol, I saw the movie and liked it. I know it's not the same as reading the book though.

See you tomorrow

Ivy Green said...

I saw the Ya-Ya movie, but I didn't read the book. The people I worked with at the time talked about the book non-stop which made me think I didn't need to read it myself because I'd "heard all about it."

Carol, what is your opinion of it, the book or the movie?

Carol said...

I liked both but I think I liked the book better. I liked her first book, I think it was first titled, "Little Alters Everywhere."

Ivy Green said...

Chloe, Is this the the website where you read about the symbolic meaning of the spider, and other animals?

http://www.whats-your-sign.com/spider-symbol-meaning.html

I found the information intriguing and something to ponder about. The nickname "spider woman" was assigned to me by other people as a joke. I don't think the spider necessarily "symbolizes" me in terms of reflecting my personality and characteristics.

From her first appearance, I felt strongly that "Charlotte" may be here to reveal something, maybe questions I am supposed to be asking myself?
"Just as the Spider weaves a web, so too must we weave our own lives. The Spider symbol meaning here serves as a reminder that our choices construct our lives. When the Spider appears to us, it is a message to be mindful of the choices we are making - and ask ourselves" these questions:

How are my choices affecting my life?

How can my choices improve my life?

How are my choices affecting others in my life?

"When we see our decisions, choices and actions as far-reaching, effective tools in life - we can see how we weave a web that can either serve us or enslave us. The Spider symbol meaning beckons us to be mindful of our behaviors - be smart about the life we weave for ourselves."

What can be more ponderous than that??
Finally, if you go to that site, be sure to watch the two-minute video of an Orb Spider weaving her web. Nature is mind boggling in its ingenuity.

jan said...

I read both books and saw the movie. I thought the books were great. I can't remember which book I liked best. Carol, Our memories are strange things. Since I came on this blog there are some memories I have that you don't remember and some you have that I don't remember. No surprise I guess - its been 30-35 years.

Ivy Green said...

Carol said, "I am a worrier. I come by it honestly because my mom was pathologic with it."

Funny thing about that, Carol, I am a worrier because my mom was not. That's what I thought growing up, that she wasn't paying attention to the right stuff. I worried for her, and I worried about her.

I know now she had lots to worry about that I knew nothing about.

That would make a good ponder topic in the near future, Carol.

"What, me worry?"

Ivy Green said...

Jan, when my brothers and I get together, we always end up reminiscing. I don't remember half the stuff they said happened. Some stuff I remember, but they don't.

jan said...

Chloe, I identify with some of the wolf symbols - I have been teaching nursing for 35 years. Family means everything to me, and I am always trying to understand my behavior (introspection) and the behavior of others.One of the areas I have been exploring in the past 15 years is dreams. I was in some dream groups in Ark. and learned to write down my dreams and try to figure out what they mean to me. I do that now. I was interested in what you guys/gals were talking about in earlier ponderings and postings about Jung and synchronicity. It is Jung's work that has been the basis of the dream work I do.

Chloe,I am wondering if the spider symbolism speaks to you?

Ivy Green said...

Jan, if you haven't read Jean Shinoda Bolen's "Crossing to Avalon" or any of her other books, you might want to look into them. She is a Jungian analyst. Dreams are very powerful to her.

Carol said...

I just looked in on that site Ivy. No wonder I love dragonflies. I'm going back to my dragonfly. I'm dragonfly lady.

jan said...

Chloe, I guess I was writing you at about the same time that you were telling about the spider symbolism. You have given me much to think about. As I look back on my life, there were many times that I gave little thought to how my choices affected myself or others. I think a lot more now about the choices I make than I did when I was younger.

Carol said...

Looked in on the owl and it's a toss up. I like them both.

jan said...

Thanks Ivy, I will look for this book, Crossing to Avalon. I have heard of it, but not read it. Sounds like a must-read.

Ivy Green said...

Have a good night, all. I will catch you on the rebound...

P.S. Charlotte worked hard tonight rebuilding her web after Hubs knocked it down while cleaning the grill. I chuckled when he came into the kitchen tonight and asked, "Is Charlotte back?" Too funny that he would even be thinking about her, let alone be concerned.

jan said...

Hey Carol, It is probably no accident that you used the dragonfly to represent your picture here. Didn't you say earlier that you did the painting on the dragonfly?

Anonymous said...

You guys have pulled me back in. Jan, Ivy originally linked some information tying together Jung and synchronocity. I stopped following my dreams a while back, thinking that they were all pretty much the same throughout the years.

But I'm so curious what you mean by the spider symbolism speaking to me, because Ivy really caught my attention with her last post.

Anonymous said...

Ivy, That's one of the sites I'd been to, but I'm really glad you directed me back to it. I was so impressed with what you have learned from Charlotte, and have passed on to all of us. I guess int that way, she's here to teach us also.

I loved the way that paragraph explains the way our choices weave our lives together, and as it pointed out, these webs cans serve us or enslave us.

You given me a lot more to ponder. You and Charlotte.

How are my choices affecting others in my life?

"When we see our decisions, choices and actions as far-reaching, effective tools in life - we can see how we weave a web that can either serve us or enslave us. The Spider symbol meaning beckons us to be mindful of our behaviors - be smart about the life we weave for ourselves."

What can be more ponderous than that??
Finally, if you go to that site, be sure to watch the two-minute video of an Orb Spider weaving her web. Nature is mind boggling in its ingenuity.

Anonymous said...

Those last 2 paragraphs were quotes from your post Ivy.

Ivy Green said...

P.P.S. My real animal is the Turtle. They have been "talking" to me all evening. No, really, my turtles have sounds that is a bit like a kitten mewing.

They're saying, "Woman, feed us!"

Carol said...

That's are really cool website Ivy. I will have to spend some time there later.

Yes Jan, after mom died I developed an attachment to dragonflies. I did that pic with some watercolor pencils.

I collect dragonflies now. My nurses have given me a lot of them.

Ivy Green said...

Carol, you have many talents.

Now, I'm leaving the Man Cave and the desk-top for the night. No dragging the laptop to bed. My stoopid laptop is infected again, so I have to trudge it back to the computer doctor tomorrow.

jan said...

Tonight has given me much to think about. I am off to bed, maybe to dream. G'nite.

Carol said...

Hey Ivy, those orb weavers are cool spiders until you get one on you horseback riding through the woods. Then it is the dance on horseback jig getting that fellow off.

Which reminds me of another story. I brought a friend up to our farm to horseback ride with Bob, my stepfather. The three of us and a couple of dogs were riding thru some pretty tight woods.

One of the dogs stirred up some ground hornets. Hornets everywhere. The horses were bucking. Not good in tight woods. I took advantage of one of the horses bucks to dismount. Actually I just let go of my grip and was airbound. My friend asked what she should do and I said I'd get off and run if I were you. She did.

Bob stayed on and his horse rolled with him. I was glad I avoided that option.

Bob yelled for us to grab the horses. I said, you nuts, it's every species for himself and I hauled ass. Poor Bob had to round up all the horses and meet us about a mile down the trail. Actually it was funnier if you had been there.

Carol said...

Jan, I went back through the comments today because it is so easy to miss one, with all the popping in and out.

I saw that you answered my question about your Native American heritage. Now I remember. Little things you write keep bringing back little memories.

I went to this inservice on Alzhemiers a couple of years ago. A neurologist spoke and was talking about memory. She said that it is normal to have difficulty remembering things as we age because we have so much information in our brains.

She described our brains as a large building with lots of rooms to store memories. She said it just takes more time to go up and down the elevator and search all the rooms for that information.

Now when I am looking for a memory, I see myself running thru the building looking in rooms. I think some of the doors are locked.

Ivy Green said...

Carol, great hornet story. So funny and strange how one story prompts another...Bear Woman had a bee encounter a couple days ago when she was cleaning hives...she set the frames too close to the house...a dense cloud of bees swarmed, & she ran for her life; then a bit later, the-unknowing Bear Husband drove up, got out of the truck and got stung twice. Bee-g Mistake!

Ivy Green said...

Last night, I mentioned Hubs knocked down Charlotte's web while cleaning the grill. He wasn't being mean, just trying to get a job done. Well, Charlotte came back and said, "Here's mud in your eye" by rebuilding a bigger, better spiderweb. It extended from the gutter over the deck, across the deck and to the tree limbs beyond the deck...a six-to-eight foot span. We watched her doing this work for about 20 minutes. She was like a gymnast or a trapeze artist. Hubs called it an engineering marvel.

Add perseverance to the list of lessons she brings. Imagine if she had put her efforts into "getting even" with Hubs instead of rebuilding.

Ivy Green said...

Ha! The bees "got even" but they got the wrong guy!

Anonymous said...

Hey Carol,
If you don't see me around for a little while, I just want you to know what's up. I'm getting so tired of hearing myself talk, and need to take a little break. I'm starting to sound like a bad rerun. Plus, I need to change some habits, and get some things done (and not be distracted from Emma). Hopefully, I'm moving on to the next stage. I'll see.

Ivy Green said...

Chloe, I continue to value your contributions. We'll be joyful to see you again when you feel restored.

"As I walk, As I walk,
The universe is walking with me."
--from the Navajo rain dance ceremony

Carol said...

Chloe,

Hey Girl, we don't get tired of hearing you talk or actually reading what you write. We learn so much from you. You add so much to my life and I will hate to not have you around. I do understand you have to do what you have to do. Is it all or nothing with the Net? Can you set aside a little time to come visit?

I know I spend time on my computer that I should be using to do other things. Not usually things I particularly want to do though. I promised myself I would clean out my truck this last long weekend. Did I? Nope. But someone once told me that when you get to the end of your life and look back, you will not regret that you didn't spend more time cleaning.

It's nice to be able to communicate with people I share common interests with and the Net is the only place I have to do that.

Hope you won't be gone for long.

jan said...

Hi Chloe, Work called so I am just now checking in. I too hope you are not gone long. I love reading your comments. Come back soon.

jan said...

Ivy, loved hearing more about Charlotte. What an amazing creature. I will think of Charlotte the next time I want to give up on something. What a wonderful life lesson.

jan said...

Carol, I love the image of the building and memories. I read somewhere that memories are stored more easily when there is emotion that is connected the the event.

jan said...

Chloe, come back when you have time and share something about Emma. I have grandchildren too and they keep me entertained.

Carol said...

We're holding our breaths Chloe....

jan said...

Hello out there. Is anyone listening? I just heard from an old friend. She wrote to say her daughter just had her first baby tonight. She shared something that touches me, maybe you have heard it before. Carol, you live on a river- so this is especially for you:
Advice from a river: Go with the flow, immerse yourself in nature, slow down and meander, go around the obstacles, be thoughtful of those downstream, stay current, the beauty is in the journey.

Ivy Green said...

Jan, Congrats to la Grandmère...fils or fille?

I love the 'Advice from..." series. I haven't come across "Advice from a Spider..." I'll ask Charlotte to get on it...

Carol said...

Never heard it Jan but definitely agree with it. I'm working on following that advice now. I have managed to pull away from my intense focus on the news.

Coming out and staying at the river helped since I don't have the 24/7 news anymore. I can get everything I need on the Net but have to work at it and now I get only what I want. It's not driven into my brain anymore and I feel better.

Instead of all the horror going on in the world, my focus is on nature with all it's beauty and peace. I'm Robin Crusoe with all the modern conveniences.

Others have noticed my more relaxed state. There is only so much negativity/intensity you can be around without it affecting your mental and physical well being. I get more than I need of that at work.

Since I am in a better place I have noticed that everything at work has also greatly improved. Your thought definitely create your reality.

jan said...

Ivy, I don't know french - but I think the babe is a fille -if that means girl. La Grandmere is someone who also -like carol - follows the advice from the river - She was a roommate- in another time and place.

Carol, I can hear it in your ponders and see it in your pictures that your focus is on nature, beauty and peace.

I want to be there too.

Ivy Green said...

Jan- "Fille" is girl. My French is very rusty. I probably failed to note before that my friend Bear Woman's mother was a French-speaking Cajun from New England. Learned to speak English only when she went to school. Bear Woman's Mamère, as she called her grandmother, never spoke English, and never went outside of her little New Hampshire town, as far as I know.

Ivy Green said...

Carol --

Amazing how people respond to us differently when we start to ease up on our own insanity.

Advice from an Owl: Seek out a wise friend

Ivy Green said...

I was just about to turn in. Went out to check on Charlotte, and I was dumbfounded to discover her dismantling her web. The just "reeled it in" like a fishing line in about two minutes flat. I have no clue what she's up to. I guess her "Advice from a Spider" is to "stick it." I'll have to wait to see what happens next.

Ivy Green said...

Well, it's nuts. Some kind of cockamamie thing she's got going on out there, and with her racing from one end to the other, back and forth. No shape or symmetry to it at all. She's got into some crazy-making stuff...

Carol said...

Sorry guys, I conked out. I take my laptop to bed and the next thing I know, I'm asleep.

Ivy, I hope Charlotte is not drinking again.

Carol said...

Jan,

I don't think I ever told you since we were sorta out of pocket for about 30 years, but I was finally diagnosed with hyperthyroidism about 9-10 years ago. Off the chart hyper. Accounts for some of my hyperness over all those years. Also why I could eat everyone else under the table and stay thin. That was nice.

Probably been that way since I was in college, at least. No one figured it out even though I went to Drs. with what should have been pretty classic symptoms. You know how they treated women. For years I had a collection of Valium prescriptions in the medicine cabinet. Never took them since the first pill usually put me out for the count.

In college, diagnosed with anxiety. Don't think so. Grad school they diagnosed me with a cardiac defect that caused rapid heart rate. Don't think so.

It's a good thing I didn't like Valium or I would have been an addict. I went thru cardiac tests in my early 40s with the symptoms and that checked out and finally I went to my gynecologist and told her to please check my thyroid. She did and bingo, that was it.

I'm sure I had it since maybe even high school. That's why with the least bit of stress I could drop 10 lbs. Remember I was 5'9" and 107 lbs in grad school. I looked like the poster child for anorexia nervosa. I could stab someone to death with my bony elbows.

When I finally got it diagnosed, I thought that maybe I needed it. It had been with me for so long. It was me. Really afraid to get rid of it even though I did control it with the antithyroid meds.

This year, I finally couldn't control it anymore. It was going up and down like a roller coaster. I knew my choices were to cut it out or blast it with radioactive iodine.

I didn't really like either option. So many complications of surgery and one Doc told me that I could get thyroid cancer with the iodine treatment if I lived long enough. You know, living in La, we already are exposed to so many carcinogens and I really prefer to stick with the carcinogens I enjoy.

Well I finally blasted it this year in April and last check I was normal, with no replacement needed right now. I am starting to pork up fast. Drats.

Another thing that made me not want to treat it is because our patho teacher in grad school, the one I was so impressed with, told us that it was better to be a little on the high side than the low side. Keeps the cholesteral level down. My cholesteral was always good.

Ivy Green said...

Carol,

I'm glad to hear you are a "good patient." The nurses I have known are terrible patients.

jan said...

Carol, I remember your rapid heart rate in grad school. I was always a little jealous that you could eat anything and not gain weight. But you did not seem to like the high calorie foods anyway. I was the sweet-freak (still am). I remember you ate vinegar on greens. I thought that was weird. I am glad they diagnosed you. I can't imagine you with any body fat.

jan said...

Ivy, good to get news of Charlotte. How interesting that she is dismantling her web. Wonder what she is up to? Please keep us informed as to her situation.

jan said...

Ivy, we have the same kind of extended family situations here in NM. I have a daughter in law who is Hispanic. She speaks Engl - a little Spanish; her mother speaks both Eng & Span, and her grandmother (who died at age 98) spoke only Spanish.

jan said...

Carol, I have a daughter in law (not the one I was just talking about) who recently had some strange symptoms: anxiety attacks, rapid increase in Blood pressure and heart rate and then after about an hour it would all go back to normal. I thought of pheochromocytoma, remember we studied this in school. They checked her for it but that was not it. They finally put her on BP meds and no more episodes. Oh, she has a long history of migraines and those have stopped too after she started the BP meds.

jan said...

Well, I thought I would drop in for a minute during lunch. Gotta get back to work. Talk to you all later.

jan said...

Carol, Let me re-phrase that. I cannot think of you with excess body fat - just to be physiologically accurate. You were always a great size. You could have been a model. In the pics I have seen of you here, I think you are still a great size. I have gained 30 lbs since our grad school days- most of it below the waist - I attribute it to the 2 M's: menopause and marriage (or re-marriage).

Ivy Green said...

Charlotte has been doing very strange things. Last night after dismantling her spiderweb, she put up another one. She got situated in the center of it and stayed there...all day! She was all-balled-up in the middle, and I thought she might be dead. But no, when I got too close for comfort, she scrambled up a thread that led to the gutter and hung out there until I left. I got a daylight picture of her. It started raining and thundering. Now the web is gone again, and so is she. What to make of it all, I don't know.

I must along because I have stuff to do to get ready for an upcoming trip...Here's a female ponder if there is such a thing...does a girl really have to go shopping for new clothes in preparation for a trip, or will "shopping in your own closet" suffice? Why don't guys think about what they're going to wear to what function?

I await your sage words...

Ivy Green said...

"Move." I must "move along..."

Carol said...

Ivy, Good patient? Nope. I'm horrible. Fortunately I have a great doc, woman, who tolerates me pretty well. With all that hyperthyroid stuff, I went to see her every two years whether I needed to or not.

Last year I had to deal with the medical establishment more than I wanted due to the three thoracic compression fractures from my slam dunk down the camp steps. I think God was trying to get me to take a week off from the job and it worked.

Nothing will keep you away from work better than being unable to move or breathe. Thought I was going to end up an invalid. I was off twice for a week(on call the entire time) but crawled back to my desk because there was no one to take my place. Job security.

I had two surgeries to jack me back up. The old cement in the vertebre trick. My bones are so thin they are invisible. They didn't find the 2nd two fractures for 4 months. They showed up after I tried to lift a 100 lb generator. I was getting ready for one of those hurricane scares last year.

My osteoporosis is partially from my neglect of my hyperthyroid so I am paying a price.

Suppose to take that daily, high dollar, injection of Forteo. I remember it every couple of weeks or so. Nope, I wouldn't say I was a good patient. I also don't have time for that nonsense. Yep, I really am a NP.

Carol said...

Don't ask me about clothes Ivy. I don't have any. Jan might remember. I'd go shopping with her and she bought lots of stuff and I came home with nada. All those clothes to look through is just too overwhelming for me.

Actually I think you did pick out some of my stuff for me Jan but your taste was a little too cutsy for me. You wanted me to wear something a model would wear and I wanted to blend into the woodwork. Seems like I remember some gaucho pants you picked out that I gave away years later with the tag still on them.

Now throw me in a sporting goods store and I find lots of stuff I like. Should have been born a guy.

Carol said...

Ivy, where are you going now? You do a lot of traveling. Make sure your laptop is working so you can keep in touch and share everything you do and see. I'll have to settle for enjoying your vacations since I can't travel anymore. My camp is my vacation.

I do hope Charlotte is OK.

jan said...

Ivy, I hope you can post your pic of Charlotte.
When I pack for a trip, I try to find out what the weather will be and think about what I will be doing. I try to cover all bases for weather as it can change in a flash. I like to take clothes I can layer.

Carol, I used to love to shop for clothes until about 20 years ago. Now I just recycle. I like to shop at thrift shops except for underwear and shoes. I don't like cutesy stuff anymore. I like denim skirts and pullover tops with shirts over the pullover. That is my uniform. I own a couple of things I can wear if I have to dress up. All my shoes have flat heels.
Hope you have a good trip Ivy.

Carol said...

So far I give Obama an A+ on health care speech

Carol said...

And if Rush et. al. try to criticize it tomorrow may their karma cause them to choke on their fat tongues or whatever God finds more appropriate. Forgive me.

jan said...

Carol, my sentiments also. I just got back from taking Lobie for a walk. She gets so excited when I ask her if she wants to go. She turns in circles and prances up and down like a puppy. Wish I could bottle that enthusiasm.

Its really cloudy here tonight. Lobie and I walked up on a hill where I can see the mountains on one side and the city on the other. There are black and grey clouds over the mountains in the East so that you can't see the mountain top. The sun is setting in the west over the city and the sky is clearer and streaked with pink. I should have taken my camera.

I guess everyone but you and I have left. Did we forget to wear our deodorant?

Carol said...

Does Lobie pull you or is she a good walker?

Carol said...

Ivy hasn't told us yet where we are going on vacation.

Carol said...

Hope they get the bugs out of her laptop.

Carol said...

And Chloe, dust if you must......

Ivy Green said...

I do wish Chloe would come back. I hope she's okay.

I was out for the evening. I listened to the big speech on the radio in the car, so I don't have the advantage of knowing how it "looked" and I didn't hear the finish. I thought it sounded okay what I heard. I'm glad the President is pushing hard on the public option, though I think it's an unfortuate name for it. It makes it sound like it IS a disease.

Hubs calling...later...

Ivy Green said...

Back now...my regular computer is still in the shop. I will be able to load the latest picture of Charlotte when I get it back.

Our upcoming trip will be to "the UK." That means I have to dig out my winter clothes earlier than I would in our southern weather here. Lots of other stuff to get done to get the house ready, even though a "sitter" will be here, there's stuff that only I can do. Hubs doesn't get that, he thinks you just walk out the door because that's what he does...

Carol said...

How long will you be gone for?

jan said...

The UK, that is a long way off. You will have stories to tell when you return - or maybe while you are there??

Lobie used to pull on the leash when she was younger, now she is much more mellow. We have about the same pace now.

Carol, does Mags go on walks with you?

Ivy Green said...

I'm trying not to think about the whole trip. That makes me tired before I even leave. I will be gone one-day-at-a-time.

jan said...

We just had a thunder and rain tonight. Does not happen often. I love it. We have a small finished basement. Once, when we first moved in we had a 2 hour heavy rainfall and water came in 2 small windows in the basement. I was alone, John was in Ark. I was sopping up water with everything I had in the house. I later had to pull up the carpet and pad down there to dry it out. Had a prof come and lay it back down. Now when it rains hard, I run downstairs to make sure its not flooding. Sorta takes a little pleasure out of the rain.

jan said...

gotta go for the night. Ivy, keep checkin in till you leave. Carol, watch out for gators.

Ivy Green said...

Every time I see the headline over Carol's Big Fish, I think it says "there's a lurker."

Did you ever read the book or see the movie, "Big Fish"? It starred Ewan MacGregor. I'll bet Chloe's read it.

Carol said...

I guess Chloe's not back. It's been such a long time since I've seen her that I don't even remember what she looks like..... What am I talking about? I don't know what she looks like. She could pass me on the street and I wouldn't know it was her.

Carol said...

Ivy, you didn't say how long you would be gone. I guess you can't take your laptop across the ocean or can you? I've never traveled across the ocean. Been to Canada and Mexico, that's it.

Long distance travel just didn't seem to be in my play book. I do love to watch travel shows but I can do that from the safety of my couch.

My older sister is the traveler. She's been just about everywhere. She got all the travel genes in the family. Mom wanted to but didn't get to much either. I think it was one of the things she was regreting at the end of her life. I could tell she had some regrets at the end. Wasn't really sure what all they were though.

Carol said...

Boy do we have some really sick people coming to jail these days. You'd think they would be just too sick to do anything they could be arrested for.

I got in this 500+ pound guy the other day. He was blind, had diabetes, glacoma, cataracts, and so many other diagnoses I almost put etc at the end of his problem list. I was sure I left out something.

They come to jail, then I'm their mama. And what is so frustrating is that many don't do a thing to take care of their problems on the outside but are sitting in my office before they got the street smell off them demanding that I check them from head to toe and fix all that ails them.

It's like now that they are in jail and don't have anything better to do with their time they'll see what we can do for them. Sometimes steam comes from my ears and sometime I just smile.

I have to and want to treat their chronic medical conditions. Many times I'm the first one to identify those conditions. I take care of anything life threatening but I tell these guys, ya didn't just check into the Mayo Clinic.

And if I don't do exactly what they want, I get a grievance written on me. I have to take valuable time out of my day to answer why I'm not ordering that face lift someone wants or removing that little fatty tumor that's been there for 20 years.

Anonymous said...

Maybe that's one of those things they want to take care of, when they do whatever they do to come back to jail. You've said before, that they get comfortable there, and when they are on the outside that you think they do things to ensure they get back in. You've got to feel sorry for them, you know they can't get many of their medical problems taken care of on the outside, unless they're veterans. And why would they keep coming back to jail, 'if' they could function on the outside. It's a tough world out here, a lot of responsibility. When they're in jail, the become someone else's responsibility. Those demands they make sound like the demands of a whining toddler. Except toddlers are cute.

Anonymous said...

Carol, I saw where you said you think your mom had regrets at the end. I don't know if she did or not, but I think that you may have misread it. (?)

I think it's important though, that you know that 'you' have done all the right things with your life, and you need to let go of any doubts, if there are any. The 'fact' that you have made those choices, did it your way... that 'fact' is enough to let you know that you are in the exact place where you are supposed to be right now. This was/is your destiny... what's meant to be. Besides, where would those guys in that prison be without you. Who else would care, or take care of them, the way you do. They're lucky you 'chose' to take on the burdens you've taken on. Just like Maggie's lucky you were in the right place to save her when you did. Remember, you always say there are no accidents.

The only reason to ever have doubts, the only purpose that doubts serve, is to show us we're due for a change. Other than that, there's no need to rethink the past. You're right where you supposed to be Carol, and there is no need to rethink your past decisions. You wouldn't be happy if you had done it differently.

Anonymous said...

Ivy, Thanks for leaving me this: "As I walk, As I walk, The universe is walking with me."

I didn't/don't have any major problems, just needed a a couple of days of restoration (as you guessed Ivy).

Sorry to hear you're leaving again, but it is such an opportunity to go to the UK. Just think of all the things you'll learn there. And we will therefore get to learn from you. Take lots of pictures, and lots of 'mental' notes.

Since you'll have a sitter, does that mean your pups can stay in the comfort of your home, that they're so familiar with?

Anonymous said...

Jan, That advice from the river was perfect. Hope Carol took it to heart:

Advice from a river: "Go with the flow, immerse yourself in nature, slow down and meander, go around the obstacles, be thoughtful of those downstream, stay current, the beauty is in the journey."

Now that's one we should read every day and use it to remind ourselves of the important things.

Carol, You should put a permanent copy of it on the site somewhere.

Also Jan, I hope you link a picture of your grand children.

Ivy Green said...

C-H-L-O-E!

That was my version of a virtual shout-out. So glad you got some R&R. I need some even before I take off on my trip, already exhausted.

Pups will still go to boarding at the vet. Daughter's b-f is our house sitter. He provides the "security", cares for "his" cat and the turtles, mail, plants...everything BUT the dogs. The reason is their medical issues, especially the oldest one, Meg, who requires daily injections. I don't even want to give the injections, Hubs usually does that.

I am quite concerned about leaving Meg at all, even at the vet's... she is getting so fragile.

Anonymous said...

I know how you feel about Meg, Ivy. I've been through the same thing. It's really hard to watch them get old and fragile, knowing you can't do anything about it. But they will have less stress at the vet and will be assured of receiving the care they need. (Do you know how many people leave them home with 'no' care, and just have someone come in once a day with food?)

Your job is to enjoy that vacation, and have faith that everything at home, including your pups, will be fine. Your hub probably won't enjoy the trip if you don't. So make sure you're 100% present there in the UK, and rest assured that all will be well when you get home.

Don't forget that we'll want to know about everything!

(when are you leaving?)

Ivy Green said...

I still have a few more days until I depart. But I'm already getting to that point where it starts to get overwhelming.

This is one of the ways I know my personality-type is introverted. Stuff that "excites" extraverts makes me feel drained.

Difference between extrovert and introvert? Extravert uses the answering machine to catch calls when they're out. Introvert uses the answering machine to screen calls when they're in.

(^_~)

Anonymous said...

"Stuff that "excites" extraverts makes me feel drained."

Same here Ivy!
Love your Extrovert/Introvert joke (which is true).

I read about introverts a long time ago, that they are very easily stimulated by a small amount of things happening. An extrovert requires a lot going on to be stimulated.

Ivy, I just looked up introvert vs extrovert, and the first thing that came up has it exactly right. When you get a chance, look at the list of situations that affect the two (the same thing, affects them all in an almost opposite. It's quick and fun to read. It's all right on.

way).http://www.newreflectionscounseling.com/Default.aspx?page=ENTER_TOPIC_INTROVERSION

Anonymous said...

oops, this is the right one:

http://www.newreflectionscounseling.com/Default.aspx?page=ENTER_TOPIC_INTROVERSION

solarcrete said...

I once had three projects going on at the same time. I had 28 people working for me, and all of the problems three fold......I loved every minute of them....I guess that Im an ex-tro..

I do love to be by myself tho, and with something to think about...I used to enjoy thinking about thinking, but can't do it well any more.....

solarcrete said...

Hey Carol.!

You out of ponders or somtin? I just saw the same fish that you caught a few day's ago, today. Getting a little rotten by now. Cook it or loose it huh.....

Anonymous said...

why?

Anonymous said...

..I used to enjoy thinking about thinking, but can't do it well any more....."

That why was for that sentence.

solarcrete said...

Chloe,

The reason is that I have lost some of the inner peace that it takes to meditate...if that is the right word...thinking about thinking to me was a way of looking inward seeing the self, and feeling the self. I did this sometimes by lying on the ground outside, spreading my arms,and relaxing....you can feel part of the world...that's when I feel the synergy of if all...I know that we are connected to that person, on the other side of the world, thru the ground..earth...???

Anonymous said...

Solar,
Can't you get back that inner peace though? Seems to me, that it's about trust.... about having enough trust to let everything go, and to just give into that feeling of being... of being a part of everything else. I guess that trust is part of letting go. Then once you let go, then maybe you can think about thinking again.

Anonymous said...

You know Solar, you have a phenomenal imagination. That takes a lot of talent.

Which brings to mind, didn't you promise Carol a post (that will make use of that talent and imagination)?

We've been waiting patiently, and one they start, we're hoping they'll become a habit.

The nice thing about Carols site, is we can post about meditation, or anything else that we can possibly think of. Carol calls it The Swamp sometimes (I think that's what you were referring to that time, Carol)

In The Swamp, we can let our imaginations run free. It's a experimental swamp, and has no limits. Its the other side of the world, the ground, the earth.

Carol, can that be our nick name: The Swamp

Anonymous said...

"I know that we are connected to that person, on the other side of the world, thru the ground..earth."

... we're not only connected, we're 'part' of it. And each person is a complete universe within him or herself.

solarcrete said...

Yes, Chloe. Trust is a big part of it...and so is humility. Right now im so mad about the way that some people suffer, and not able to put it aside for now, and can't trust too many people either: for a lot of reasons, that includes trying to protect some of my family, from the courts, and all.

The humility that I talk about, is like-when some monks go into silence to achieve peace of mind..and talking about the things that one knows is kinda like bragging. To me right now it is like sharing...but I have been thinking of cutting back, on all of my talking....just so hard with U, Carol, Sea, now Ivy and Patsi of course. That what I like a lot about Don 1 he knew what I was talking about,,even tho I was doing it in some other for, or subject...that's what he meant, that I gave him too much, too heavy of a subject to think about sometimes...it can be confusing sometime....even to a guy like him...

I think that's why he doesn't come around a lot...he is not afraid to talk about things...but he knows about losing humility.....

That thing is starting to smell.....fishy Carol...

Anonymous said...

Yeah, I know exactly what you mean Solar. It's hard to not be mad, when more than our share of troubles comes around. There's that whole heirarchy of needs, and when there are too many stress factors, which we all become overloaded with, from time to time, then self actualization takes a back seat.

All I can say is what I say to myself, when things get overwhelming: This too shall pass.

But it seems to me, that if you 'ever' needed meditation, this is the time.

solarcrete said...

Chlo,

Yes we are, and thats what is sad about religion. It gets so close to saying it, but then back off when we have to choose the right god...like winning the lottery. which god is the right one, and which religion is the right one.

The right one for me: You just said it. We are all a universe, and a part of the whole, so I think that I will do just one thread post...that will include that picture of the person on my mountain top....

Carol, just kidding you a little..I don't mind the fish...

Anonymous said...

Solar, I think TM is part of the change, that we're all there for some (maybe)unknown reason. If you don't want to be there, then you shouldn't. If you do want to be, then you should. It's that simple.

Talking things out is just as important as that meditation you're talking about, imo. I think part of the anger (and consequent stress) you're feeling, is part of the changes you are and have gone through.

Everything that's happening, everywhere (including withn us) is just progression.

solarcrete said...

my last post was in answer to your 11:19

Anonymous said...

"thats what is sad about religion. It gets so close to saying it, but then back off when we have to choose the right god...like winning the lottery. which god is the right one, and which religion is the right one."

You're right, of course. But I still get he feeling you're not through with the subject, that you're still also trying to convince yourself. You know darn well, you can't change anyone else's mind about anything they don't want to change.

Anonymous said...

"I think that I will do just one thread post...that will include that picture of the person on my mountain top...."

Yes!

solarcrete said...

Chlo,

My study of religion will never be over, it is just to vast of a subject to understand, but once certain parts are understood, they are not important to me,any more, not so much any way...

We can't change the minds that are already made up...agreed, but there are a lot of confused minds that are out there also, and I know that I have pushed a few people toward thinking for themselves...

solarcrete said...

One last thing about religion Chlo. Im so positive about my conclusions about it...because of all the information that I have come across, about it. I can tell you who wrote the bible ,and who did not..I have listened to many, many scientist,in all types of different fields,,and coming to my own conclusions of who, what , where we came from, and where we are going....I have to look up individual subject matter..in order to talk about it properly...but it's there...see you a little later...have two lawns to cut..but Im sure happy to have talked to you...give a little kiss to Emma for me..and a hug for U...

Anonymous said...

"I know that I have pushed a few people toward thinking for themselves..."

.. well then, I stand corrected. Spread the wisdom. :)

I have to leave for a while.

solarcrete said...

Chlo, I have a freind that is named Maury: He is Jewish, he married a polish girl name Linda, a sister of a brother in law of mine. We have talked a lot about the indoctrination of the very young...what choice do they have, in being baptized or anything else?

When they did get married: They had three children, they decided to wait and give those children the opportunity to choose for themselves in the matter of religion....they are now in college, and are very happy, and don't intend to choose any religion. They look at it as a big scam, as I do...Linda says that it was of all the talks that we used to have...and are a lot happier without the pressures that they see in others...

solarcrete said...

Linda is Catholic....

Carol said...

Hello guys. Nice to see you back Chloe. My heart is happy. Nice for you to drop in Solar.

Felt like I was easedropping on a therapy session today. I think it's Solar who nicknamed our site the Swamp and I like it. It works well for this site. Maybe I should change the name. I wonder if they already have that name?

I have to go to my NP meeting tonight and don't really feel like it. It's all rainy outside and I'm all cozy here inside and don't want to move.

Are you getting this same rain Chloe? I think it is from that little tropical low in the Gulf. It's supposed to be rainy for days.

You always have such good advice Chloe. You are so intuitive and insightful. I hope you got gased up over the last couple of days and are good for a while.

Solar the fish is history. He was very yummy fried up in spicy cornmeal and drizzled with lemon juice. And that sucker is going to stare at you guys until someone comes up with a ponder. You all have good ponders. I can feel them.

Wow, there's a frog strangler going on out there right now. If that doesn't let up, I'm not going anywhere. There's surf out on the river.

solarcrete said...

Carol,

I have been enjoying your re-union with your friend. I will wait and choose when to post, cos it is mainly women talk...and im the only guy, so feel a little out of place....

Carol said...

You are the one guy that can balance us out Solar.

Carol said...

It's weird how we can let our good friends go and not keep in touch. I've never been good with loss. When a good friend left I went thru a grief process. Then it was pretty much like that part of my life was dead.

I've always felt like friendship is an everyday thing. I like talking with my good friends every day. That used to be more difficult to do at a distance but now with the Internet it is easy. Also I'm better with separation now.

I'm not that crazy about Facebook. Actually it makes me nervous with some of the things I've read but Chloe talked me into joining up. I'm glad she did because it did get me reconnected with Jan. Synchronicity.

Carol said...

There are a lot of cool guys on the Trail, but Solar you are the coolest.

Carol said...

I should be on my way to my meeting but I forgot I didn't have any Maggie food made for tonight so I'm whipping it up now. I will be late to the meeting. The Magster is my priority.

solarcrete said...

Thanks Carol, blushing over here...

jan said...

I have been "out of pocket" all day. So glad to see Chloe & Solar are back and Ivy has not left yet. I havn't had time to read all the comments. Have to make a home visit with a teen mom and her babe right now, but look forward to connecting again in a little while.

Anonymous said...

Carol, You mentioned rain, but we haven't had a drop today, I'm sorry to say. It rained buckets here yesterday, and I'm always happiest when it's raining.

I don't like Facebook much either. But it's handy to have there, just in case. You never know when it will come in handy. I didn't realize that's how you and Jan got back in touch.


"You are the one guy that can balance us out Solar."

... this is an equal opportunity Swamp.

I may just go on strike until Solar makes that post of his.

Have a good meeting tonight Carol, and Jan, hope you have a happy story for us when you get back, about that teen mom and her baby.

See ya tomorrow.

Carol said...

Well I'm back and it was worth the trip, the food that is. Since you guys, if you take any prescription drugs, are paying for my meal, I will let you enjoy it vicariously.

Started with a nice fruit and cheese tray. Then we had appetizers, brought to the table, of fried asparagus with a holandaise sauce drizzled over it and stacked like firewood, braised tuna with something crunchy on top surrounded by multicolored little circles of sauces, I not sure what kind, and spicy grilled shrimp.

Then came a small cup of crawfish bisque, creamy and rich and slap yo mama good. Best crawfish bisque in town. A nice spinach salad with walnuts, little grape tomatoes, blue cheese, purple onion, and mushrooms with a creamy house dressing.

Instead of having us select from several main course options they just brought out a plate with half of a baked red snapper with a creamy lemon saffron sauce topped with lump crabmeat and half of a fillet mignon in a red wine reduction sauce. Side of fried little red potatoes wedges and thin whole string beans.

Sorry but you didn't get any desert because we were just too full and I wanted to get home. Drinks were whatever we wanted and I just had a coke. Don't often drink alcohol.

Did you enjoy our dinner as much as I did? Fortunately you won't have to suffer the reflux I will tonight.

These drugs companies actually like NPs because unlike the Docs, we listen to what they have to the speaker. Doesn't help me any because I don't have any of their drugs on my formulary. They only market the high dollar meds and I have to choose from the cheap but effective ones.

I tell my inmates even though we have a limited formulary, we use what we know is tried and true and what we won't find out next week will kill them. And most important, what they can afford to purchase when they get out of jail.

Carol said...

Sorry about that nutty sentence. I changed part of the sentence but forgot to change the rest of it. I'm drunk on food.

Ivy Green said...

Carol,
That meal sounds mouthwatering. I've never had crawfish bisque, but I aim to try it, if it's anything like crab bisque. When I go back to visit in Maryland, I always order crab bisque, or crab cakes, or both at every meal.
Tonight I am so tired, I just had toast for dinner. Even that was too much work.

Carol said...

Ivy, how's Charlotte and where do spiders go when it rains?

Ivy, years ago I had this little long legged spider that I found in my bathroom on the shower wall close to the shower nozzle. There was a little opening around the pipe to the nozzle. He probably came in there.

I found him when I went to take a shower one day. My first thought was to kill him and get him out of there but for some crazy reason I didn't. After I passed up that initial opportunity, I couldn't kill him.

I'd turn on the water to take my shower and he swayed back and forth like he was trying to hang on during a hurricane. I'm sure it seemed like that for that little spider. We kind of bonded. He was there every day when I took my shower. I never saw him move. Don't know where or when he left to eat.

He lived in that same spot for at least a couple of months until one day I went into take a shower and found him dead in the bottom of the tub. I felt sad. I don't know if I ever shared that story with anyone. It was probably best that I didn't. They wouldn't have understood.

Carol said...

Over the years I've had a lot of relationships that bugged me but I promise that was the only bug I have had a relationship with.

Ivy Green said...

Carol,
Do the guys in your place ever "bond" with critters in their quarters? Even though they are crowded in with people all day, they must still feel isolated from the world.

I have to go see about Charlotte. She wasn't there last night, but she had "worked" all day. When it rained last weekend, I saw her retreat to the tree. The other day, she ran up to the rain gutter and hung onto the edge.

Ivy Green said...

Chloe,
I've been "studying" the introvert/extravert site you referenced. That was a goldmine of information, and a lot that fits me to a tee. Thank you.

Ivy Green said...

Carol,
Was your guy a daddylonglegs? I might have a hard time bonding with that...Charlotte has had a real personality...

jan said...

Wow! you folks have really talked today. I took a little break. I had to get ready for classes to begin on Monday and go to some meetings. I visited a little teen friend (Sophie) and babe tonight. When I first met Sophie and her baby she was homeless and living in a shelter for teen mothers and their babies. She now has an apartment. She is originally from Pakistan. She was asking me tonight if I knew how she can get her aunt and the aunt's baby to the US. The aunt's husband beats her and she wants to get away from him. Sophie tells me this happens all the time in Pakistan. My little teen friend was adopted here in the US when she was 14. Her English is great.

jan said...

Carol, I am sitting here salivating reading about your dinner tonight. I think it is great work you do with the men who are incarcerated. But I can hear the frustration in your words. Chloe has wise words for you. When we have a loss, we have to find ways to heal. I remember when I moved away from LA, I was so excited about a new place to live, and then about 6-9 months later I began to feel the loss of leaving a best friend and another life behind.

jan said...

Solar, no need to feel out of place. I enjoy reading your comments. You gave me much to think about tonight when you talked about how laying on the ground can make you feel connected to that other person on the other side of the earth. Like Chloe said, that is so creative.

jan said...

Thinking of prisoners and critters, I remember an old movie, Birdman of Alcatraz, about a guy in a very isolated prison and his relationship with a bird or birds. Its a really old movie so don't remember the specifics. The birdman was Burt Reynolds, who is dead now.

jan said...

Speaking of religion, I could almost do a ponder on that. We went to church every night when I was a small child.I thought it was a sin to go to movies. In fact, in this church, anything that was joyful was a sin. It sort of ruined me for religion. On the other hand, I do believe in prayer. I don't care for religions that scare small children.

jan said...

Carol, I am really happy to be in contact with you again. You were my best friend for 9 years and I missed you. We had so much history together. My boys thought you were their aunt.

jan said...

Chloe, I want to see that picture of the person on your mountain top.

Carol said...

Somebody must like this fish because. I swear we could have made a lot of good ponder posts from some of the things that have been discussed here in the comments. I'm kinda on strike waiting....

And Ivy, I really don't know if the inmates would bond with any critters they find in jail. I don't get that close to them to discuss that. I really don't think it would be a spider that they would bond with because spiders have a bad reputation in jails and prisons. They are blamed for all the MRSA that is found there.

Since there is a big turn over, often heat and humidity, stress from change in lifestyle, these guys and girls come down with these nasty boils. They call them "spider bites". It could actually be a bite from a knat or a mosquito or ant, etc. It could just be that they scratched an itch and innoculated themselves with staph. I would bet that a spider would be the least likely cause.

This MRSA is also found in high school locker rooms, work out gyms, in places solders stay etc.

Sometimes they even bring me the poor little dead spider and say this is what did it to me. I tell them that now that he's dead I can't even question him and besides that, it is a security issue. I don't get involved with interrogation of suspects.

Carol said...

Jan, I think that is Solar's person on the mountain top.

Religion would make for some good ponders. I really think that no matter what your thoughts and feelings are, we all need some type of spirituality in our lives.

Ivy, my spider looked more like a daddymediumlegs. His legs weren't quite that long. Didn't really have any personality to speak of. And he certainly wasn't cuddly looking. Wouldn't have left him in my bed.

Anonymous said...

Hi Ivy, Toast is one of my favorite foods at night. We rarely eat dinner, but go for the easy snacks, and toast or fruit is my favorite. I love all the simple foods.

A lot of that introvert site fits me well too Ivy. That's why I found it so interesting, when you brought it up and told that answering machine story, joke, whichever, it was great.

Anonymous said...

Hey Jan, What you said about having a delayed reaction when you moved away from Louisiana, well, I can completely relate to that feeling. I think any kind of loss leads to a period of mourning, or something very similar to it. Any kind of change often feels like a loss, and any kind of loss is often painful. (Your spider was a loss, Carol)

What a happy teen and baby story that is Jan. I mean the part that she's pulling things together. Can she get her aunt with her baby to the U.S.?

Burt Reynolds, I think, is still alive. But I looked up Birdman of Alcatraz, and it was Burt Lancaster, who is long gone now. I remember the movie too, but only vaguely, but know it was a good one back in '62 (year per Amazon).nd bab

Anonymous said...

Carol, I think that was the best meal they've fed you so far, wasn't it?

I understand the feeling behind that spider/shower episode, because I've done it with so many small animals (not insects, that I can remember, but the same feeling). It's that feeling you get when you can make a difference (control), in some small way, and save a living being or at least make that living beings life easier. That's how I ended up with too many critters. Lets face it, it's a form of 'caring' too much. Which I'm sure all of us here do. I can tell by listening to you all talk. That little spider, I think, was Carol making a difference, protecting another life, observing.


Ok then, busy day. Hope you all have a great one.

Anonymous said...

Oh, forgot.
We're sure looking forward to that post Captain.

jan said...

Opps, solar - It is your person on the mountaintop.
Another oops, Chloe, you are so right - It was Burt Lancaster, not Burt Reynolds.

Chloe,that was a question Sophie asked me last night - Did I know of any way to get her aunt here to the US? I do not know of any way. If anyone has any ideas, let me know.

I too am an introvert. I have taken the Myers Briggs test several times. Are you all familiar with that test? When I was much younger, I was in the middle between extro and intro but as I get older, I score much higher on introversion. I love being with people for periods of time, but then I have to get by myself to sort of pull myself back together. I love to sit on my front porch by myself. My front porch is where I took the pics of Lobie and her friend, Willie. It is a great place to just contemplate. I have some little hummingbirds who love the big tree and plants out front. The hummers flit back and forth between trees and plants.

jan said...

I was just rubbing Lobie's head and I think she has a cataract in her left eye. She has always had little blue spots on her eyes, but this is definitely sort of a milky area that is on her eye. What do you all think? We think she was a year old when she came to live with us and we have had her 10 years.

jan said...

Carol, a while back you were comparing yourself with your sister - that she is a world traveler and you like to stay close to home- or something like that. Its interesting though because when I knew you, you loved an adventure. You introduced me to snow skiing and canoeing and camping. You were so excited about these adventures. You read all about it, made the plans and then taught the rest of us what we were supposed to do. Some of my favorite memories are those adventures with you. One of the scariest things was when we were skiing and got off the ski trail and could very easily have slid off a cliff if we hadn't been able to side-step back up the incline to the trail. You were very athletic and sidestepped up to the trail quickly. It took me longer and I remember my heart pounding. I thought I might die there.

I used to love moving to new places. I was always ready for a move whether it was to a different house or a different town/city, state or country. As I am older now, I don't look forward to moving again. I hope I can stay right where I am for a long time.

Ivy Green said...

You all have been doing a great job keeping the conversations going. I see I won't have to worry about you taking good care of yourselves in my absence.
Charlotte should be able to take care of herself too. I'm not sure my daughter or her b-f will take much interest in her, or have time for her.
Last night, I discovered Charlotte had relocated her spiderweb. She moved it under cover of the tree limbs, and was thus sheltered from the rain. I think she's proving herself to be a smart girl.

Ivy Green said...

Last summer, we toured the former prison at Alcatraz. I thought about the Birdman. The true story was altered for drama purposes for the movie, but there is still lots of drama associated with the prison and the island. One amazing thing is there was a thriving community there with families, and children growing up there, going to school. Parts of it are beautiful, in the middle of San Francisco Bay, but still it has a forbidding sense about it...and cold, bone-chilling cold in the middle of summer.

Ivy Green said...

Mark Twain once said, "The coldest winter I ever spent was a summer in San Francisco."

Ivy Green said...

I was alarmed to see the flags at half-mast today, that I had missed some big news, until I remembered it's September 11. I will never forget the horror of that day, and my sense the world as we knew it would never be the same.

My niece and her husband survived the falling of the towers, they fled their nearby apartment as the ash was falling on them. They became separated from one another, and spent an anguished day trying to learn if one another had survived. Fortunately, they both did. It was over a month before they could go back to their apartment and rescue any of their belongings. They live in Texas now, and have two beautiful children born after 9/11. Life does go on.