Saturday, April 3, 2010

Where should Chloe plant her Wisteria??






Decisions, decisions. Where to plant the Wisteria.






You have the option of letting it grow up a tree.





















It can be used to dress up the hurricane damage.


























It can hide a fence.










Or it can just stand alone in the yard.
I added a pic of Maggie and her Easter bunny. Happy Easter. Tag, your it Chloe, Coreen, Ivy, Jan or Solar for the Easter post.




122 comments:

Carol said...

Mag and I snapped those pics on the way to put clothes in the wash. I was rushed. I need Coreen to give me some lessons on how to arrange the pics and the words on a post. I can't make it do what I what it to do.

Carol said...

You will have to click on each pic to really see the Wisteria.

Ivy Green said...

Carol,
There is nothing wrong with your picture arrangements. It's aligned perfectly. Thanks for the post.

Carol said...

I couldn't get the words to go next to the pics. It would be there when I composed but not there when I previewed. I gave up.

Hope I gave Chloe some ideas.

Ivy Green said...

Solar,
Re: your last post on the previous thread. The folks lining up for I-Pad is a perfect example of powers-that-be herding us hapless ones into the scarcity mentality. What Dr. Meg Wheatley has been writing about for a decade or more.

Ivy Green said...

"To resolve most dysfunctional situations, the first thing to do is flood them with information."

Margaret J. Wheatley

Ivy Green said...

Where's da wabbits?

Peter Rabbit hopped away from Central Park?

I wonder if anyone's checked for a bunny fur lining in Pale Males's nest?

Solar said...

Ivy,

I meant to thank U for that post that u made last, or the one before that about M. J. Wheatley, i did read something about her a while back...but have forgotten about her...will see what she is up to now....and also thanks for not being offended when I say some of the things that I do.....would like to read it again, will look for it a little later....a little lazy today, so im going to take a ten min. nap. and start me exercises...

Solar said...

"To resolve most dysfunctional situations, the first thing to do is flood them with information."

It is the only way, and the hardest thing to do....most ignore what is best for them.....I really like this pink, M.J.W.

Ivy Green said...

An addendum to Meg Wheatley's quote: it has to be REAL information, not selective half-truths, let alone outright propaganda we've been getting a repetitive diet of from all media outlets for almost a decade.

That was my soap box for the day. Back to the trivial and superficial. Much more fun. lol

Ivy Green said...

Solar,
If you can get Rick to post here, we would love it! We'd like to eavesdrop on some of those exchanges between you and him. lol!

Ivy Green said...

Solar,
One thing always leads to another...I'd forgotten that ten to twelve years ago, I hung on every word of Meg Wheately's. Like most stuff after a while, I put it down and moved on. Or maybe I just didn't have an outlet for it. Then yesterday, the gals here posted about how they came up with their dogs' names. Voila! A memory was triggered and more was revealed. That is probably another example in action (a small one) of Meg Wheatley's theory. Put the information out there without fear or urge to control, and people will make something happen with it that's least expected...

Solar said...

Ivy,

It pretty goes much his way...for everything that I point out in the way of science he points out that it is in the bible...I have only read the old testament, and won't have anything to do with the new...he does not preach at all, but does point out that what I love about mother nature, is what he loves about the bible. and god..he agrees with me that we are all part of it all...but not that we are the whole..only bit and pieces...and that god is the only whole...not the god that was invented to used as an advertising sales gimmick.

He doesn't like that the church teaches that "upon this rock" stuff, god did not build a building or assigned Peter as the rock...also said that M. Magdalen was not what the church made her out to be..but a victim of the apostles...does agree with me about many things...but at the same time does not for different reasons..

Little story about him...when he was in California..he was a roof specialist...for special type roofs..and a can do a lot of plumbing, electrical, etc....he met a lot of Hollywood actors doing this....while studying his theology...the comic Don Rickles called him to do an emergency plumbing job, during a party...My bro....would not until he and Don talked about the bible a little....did not tell me what it was all about..but he and Don R. did talks and then he fixed his plumbing problems...said that he knew that is was real easy...I know that he won't do this blog thing...but will answer any questions put to him......trouble is he won't shut up......wonder where he gets that from???

When we were young and lived in an a neighborhood that was mixed, from Jews, Mexican, Italians, Irish, German, and more...it was a pretty rough hood, and I would not let him and another bro, out of my site..no gangs I told them for us...and kept them out from the gangs reach...I paid for it by getting in fights all of the time..but when we moved to great hood..that had the same type of people in it...but more educated, and better living conditions...they fit right in...me I was still from the old hood, but got into sports in order to fit in also.....Rick told me just a few years ago..he was about 48, that i was his hero.....My other family members are afraid to talk about science and religion....they have been trained to ignore certain truths...very intelligent, but deny evolution....and that is why I talk about it so much....

Ivy Green said...

Solar,
Keep talkin' and if you can keep Rick talkin' too, the world will be a better place for it.

The Internet has created a new and bigger place for "pernicious forces" to move in, manipulate and control with disinformation, misinformation, distortions, and fabrications. I suppose none of that is new in the world, just a new format for it. I still like what Meg Wheatley says, in general, but there is that part of me that sees the misuse of information and wonders if even more information can really be the simple solution. She says it is.

Solar said...

When we were young he told me that I was his hero...just to clarify that...his only hero is Yahweh.....

Ivy, If U like M.H.W. for her understanding that educating, and having people understand their world...U would love prof John Hagelin....he tried to get the country to listen to him when He ran for potus in 1980,,,even built up a grass roots organization....from dog catcher to city congress people...but like I tell people...he had a solution to apathy, but noone would listen..he wanted to govern from the center of the world...us....and educated us in natural law and natural solutions....to our energy needs, and get us off OIL, and the need for wars...he now teaches the same things, and also transcendental meditation...I think like Spinoza...he is way ahead of his times..and no one listened to him......

Ok time to shut up...sun is out and im gone.....love and light to all......

Solar said...

Ivy, before I go,( and wish that I could write like u and the others do, to get what I really want to say across) thanks for not taking what I say about organized religion and all personally...My Father was a religious bully, and he pushed his weight around...but I would not let him touch my two younger brothers. Al and Rick..told him to take it out on me...he would and that was fine with me....but the reason that I went into the Marine Corps was not for the call of duty..but to keep from harming him, or worse.....told him that if he touche my bros..that I would not forget it....

Funny thing is that he never did...but when I came home...for a visit once...I told him not to wake me by the shoulders like he used to...he did and I knocked him on his ass...and out cold....u see, I had to sleep with one eye open at the barracks for a long time...

This thing about synergy that I always talk about...is why I flew to Mexico to forgive him, and then to forgive myself, I realized that it all stemmed from him...once that was, those feeling gone...and I understood where they originated ..i was much happier, and started thinking about how religion, and other herd mentalist's effected our family, and since over many, many years came to what I believe now....so I do know that many people do many fine, and good things....but they do them mostly cos they want a reward of living forever...educating is the only way to overcome this, and the sciences, that all come together now, all of them is the way to do it imo.....

One last thing....I have in my bag of tricks for my bro...is the arrangement of the six floods, that the bible can't answer.....

Solar said...

Dang it....see, see what I mean.......arrangement= argument

Don't laugh at me Sally.!!

Chloe said...

Carol, Thank you so much for this post and the beautiful pictures.

Ever since you talked about them, I've been seeing them along the roads that I frequent, and realize I just wasn't paying attention. I even found out we have a very small amount in our front parkway, on the outside of our fence that is covered in shrubbery and trees. If it keeps growing, I'll take a shot of it.

The one I've got is about 5' tall, and I've decided to plant it along a partial fence not far from my house this weekend (although I have some digging and cutting back to do first), so It'll be close enough that it'll be easy to water, and hard to forget. If I'm successful, then you'd better believe you'll see some pics of it eventually. Also, if it does grow well for me, I'm going to plant it on our side of some cross fencing we have for the horses and along one of our outside fences. It's a lot longer run, so I'd have find a bunch of smaller starter ones (if possible) and use one of those drip hoses (or something like that).

I am so grateful and flattered that you did that post to help me get my rear in gear. Thanks.
Great job on the post too, Carol

Chloe said...

I've taken into consideration what you said about the hummers coming back when they know there's food for them. I'm not sure of all the flowers they feed from, but I remember Coreen saying last year that she saw a type they like in a few of the pictures I took on the property.

Our fuchsias outside my office window are blooming beautifully this year, a shade of hot pink. Also, we had a huge Magnolia tree over there, that was not looking too healthy the last few years. During one of the storms this last winter, the top half broke off broke off, and it became a shorter Magnolia (still big). But the amazing thing, is that it's healthy (and happy looking) again.

We have 8 or 9 dogwoods (white)out back (pretty far from the house) that are blooming nicely this year too - but the loom sure doesn't last long.

Did you notice that once Spring finally arrived this year, everything seemed to bloom over night? I still have a few trees that have a ways to go, and one that I planted several years ago that a notoriously late bloomer (don't know the name, but it has beautiful fluffy (can't describe) flowers for a while after if first blooms, I had one in California, love it, and found one here (looked like a crooked stick with no growth when I got it) but once it blooms, it's beautiful. I get a shot of that one when it finally comes around too.

Carol said...

Chloe, don't bust your ass too much, Wisteria's beauty is short lived. Just a short time in the Spring and it's over. Now, you ought to think about trying to find some of that Mexican Turk's Cap. It blooms from Spring until fall and the hummers and butterflies love it. Get the scarlet.

Chloe said...

I feel soooooooo much better, when I sit down at this computer, read all you guys posts, and talk about things like the things we talk about. The 'real' world can be pretty tough some times, and it's nice to be able to come here and concentrate on what's 'really' important.

Chloe said...

"Don't laugh at me Sally.!!"

I 'always' laugh at you Solar - and I'm still waiting for those fuzzy pics you took.

Carol said...

You have fuschias??? I didn't think they could live around here. I found some at one of the nurseries once and they were dead within weeks. I even brought some home from the PNW and again dead within weeks. I usually have a green thumb so I thought we just didn't have the right climate for them.

Chloe said...

Hi Jan, Looks like you got us all craving Blue Bell ice creams around here. I hope you're able to find yours. I like the vanilla plain, or sometimes with canned (sweet) peaches on it (a little juice and all). Or root beer (diet though :) on it to make a great big float. It's so good. The only other ice cream I really love are the Hagendause vanilla bars covered with chocolate and walnuts, but seldom eat them (only once in a while when I'm on the road.

I can't take credit for finding that Blue Bell link though - Ivy was the one that was so kind as to link that site for you. I wish I had thought of it though.

Chloe said...

The people before us planted them. We have a sandy soil - I wonder if that's why they grow here?

I'll take a pic of them tomorrow (when I take Emma's) and you can make sure I have it right.

Chloe said...

Carol, Hubby says he's positive their fuchsias. We have sandy, acidic soil (and like you, lot's of rain. Not far from our area, the soil changes drastically.

Ivy Green said...

Solar,
I'm so sorry that you had physical and emotional abuse by your father in your upbringing, including the religious bullying which is hypocritical to say the least; plus you having the responsibility for protecting your brothers from the man who himself should have been protecting all of you.

You don't owe any thanks or apologies to me either way for expressing your opinions. Our freedom of religion includes the freedom to have no religion. It's the most important reason to keep religious expression out of the governmental environment. I say this even though I don't agree with atheism or the anti-religious dogmatists who at times go overboard in the other direction of keeping the public arena "God-free." It's all about checks and balances, and they keep things from tilting too far in the religious direction. We keep them from tilting us too far in the anti-religion direction. So it works out for everybody in the end.

P.S. You may wish you could write like me, but I wish I could speak Spinach like you. Besides, ur ritin iz prittie bueno enyway. lol

Chloe said...

"The Internet has created a new and bigger place for "pernicious forces" to move in, manipulate and control with disinformation, misinformation, distortions, and fabrications."

Ivy, I agree - and it spreads like wild fire (in the wind). Propaganda, lies, all those things you listed. Gossip has taken on a whole new meaning.

Chloe said...

... gossip is now News.

Chloe said...

"... "for everything that I point out in the way of science he points out that it is in the bible"

Solar, That's why I think we can all end up believe pretty much the same thing, using different criteria to get there.

Most people have a lot more in common than they realize. I would never try to talk someone into changing their religious beliefs - Never. Nor would I demean what's important to them. Agreeing is not important - just interesting.

Chloe said...

... actually, what I meant to say is that the 'disagreements' are interesting. The agreements are nice only because they validate our beliefs.

Carol said...

Guys, you're killing me.

Carol said...

The funny stuff, that is, not the sad stuff. Solar started the laugh fest yesterday.

jan said...

Chloe, thanks for letting me know Ivy posted the link about BB IC.

Ivy, thanks for the link. I intend to visit Albertsons or the other ones on the link until I find some Bluebell.
I loved the Bluebell commercials too when I lived in TX and AR

Carol said...

My SF called again. Told me he had an earache and needed to go to the ER. I told him that his wait would be twice what it would have been 2 days ago. I guess since the other ache didn't work out that well for him, he decided to try a new one. Can't think of anything life threatening about an earache and don't believe him now. One ER per holiday is all I have in me. He does know how to drive.

jan said...

Carol, I like your post with pics of wisteria. We don't have that here in NM. Probably needs water. I am going to look for those Mexican Turk's Caps to plant here. It sounds like something that might grow here. I do have some flowering plans in front and next to the house that I have to water. The hummers love some of the blooms on these.

jan said...

We just got back from watching our little 8 y/o grand daughter play soccer. She was so cute out there. Her dark brown hair is almost to her waist and her mom had it in 2 braids. She looks a lot like her mom with her big brown eyes. She is a fierce little soccer player. She often plays goalie and is good at it. She has asthma and twice today had to sit out for a few minutes to use her puffer.

jan said...

Carol, don't you have Urgent care clinics there? Would he go to one of those? John and I go to one when we can't get in to see our Doc. I think the docs in these are just fine for treating simple stuff.

Chloe said...

"you ought to think about trying to find some of that Mexican Turk's Cap. It blooms from Spring until fall and the hummers and butterflies love it. Get the scarlet."

Thanks Carol, will do. I want something that blooms longer. I liked the idea that the Wisteria takes off so quickly, but it sounds like those dogwoods, gone before you get much of a chance to enjoy them.

Chloe said...

Jan, we have a lot of urgent care clinics here too, open 24 hours. Do they take medicare though?

Chloe said...

... I assume that's what your SF uses Carol. (?)

Carol said...

Jan, none of the urgent care places are open on weekends. Jan, the man can have his scapula broken in 20 pieces and not have much pain. I don't think this is anything but a plea for someone to go spend time with him. When we do go, he goes to bed. He sits and doesn't talk. He is a miserable person and wants company. He could come over here and even sleep if he wants to. I have a comfortable guest bed.

Solar said...

Chloe,

"... "for everything that I point out in the way of science he points out that it is in the bible"

Solar, That's why I think we can all end up believe pretty much the same thing, using different criteria to get there."

I did not say that exactly the right way..what i meant is that he also knows quite a bit about science, and wants to say that it is in the bible...I won't compromise on most of it...and scientifically there is no explanation to what is in the bible..not a real one...

but getting to the same place using different criteria is kinda of an interesting think.!! will let u know...about those fuzzy pinks...the dog ate them..can't wait for your showing Emma and u together....
Give my hoss, an easter apple tomorrow huh?

Carol said...

He's 81 and does have Medicare. Many of those places not only don't take Medicare, they won't see you if you have it. They will even get in trouble if they accept cash.

Coreen said...

These wisteria pics are great examples of
a southern country road complete with that
spanish moss on the trees...a great way to
imagine a sunny spring day down by your river...

Carol said...

Ok guys, I added a pic of Maggie and her Easter bunny. When I tried to put her down at the bottom, I lost two pics and had to redo it. This blogger is not very cooperative.

Someone else is up for tomorrow.

Coreen said...

Just great...

Maggie & her purple Easter bunny...

Carol said...

The bunny goes with the Wisteria.

Coreen said...

And you could simply add a Happy Easter to the
heading & there we have a splendid Easter post....

Carol said...

You mean we will have to settle for snaggle tooth and her bunny?

Solar said...

Carol,


The Truth About Medicare


The phone rings and the lady of the house answers, "Hello."
''Mrs. Sanders, please"..
''Speaking."
''Mrs. Sanders, this is Doctor Jones at Saint AgnesLaboratory. When your husband's doctor sent his biopsy to the lab last week, a biopsy from another Mr. Sanders arrived as well."
"We are now uncertain which one belongs to your husband.. Frankly, either way the results are not too good."
''What do you mean?" Mrs. Sanders asks nervously.
"Well, one of the specimens tested positive for Alzheimer's and the other one tested positive for HIV. We can't tell which is which."
''That's dreadful! Can you do the test again?" questioned Mrs. Sanders.
"Normally we can, but Medicare will only pay for these expensive tests one time."
''Well, what am I supposed to do now?''
The folks at Medicare recommend that you drop your husband off somewhere in the middle of town. If he finds his way home, don't sleep with him."

Carol said...

Another good one Solar. You've really perked up this weekend.

Carol said...

I just called a friend to read her that joke.

Solar said...

I have one more for Maria, if she wants to hear a little bit of when I was six years old.??

Carol said...

Chloe, it is amazing what we don't notice when we aren't really looking for it. You guys have opened my eyes to many new things. Thank you all!

And Ivy, the hummer has been more visible today. He must like the warm weather.

Carol said...

Chloe, are you and the Emster going to dye some eggs? Get some pics. I have mine boiling and then I'm gonna use my Tie Dye Egg Coloring Kit. Of course I'll have to peel them to put them in my potato salad and to make the angeled eggs but what the heck, it's Easter.

jan said...

Carol, if no one else comes up with an Easter post, your pic of Maggie and her purple bunny is perfect

jan said...

Chloe, I think you are right. I just asked John b/c he has medicare and he does not think they do.

jan said...

"Many of those places not only don't take Medicare, they won't see you if you have it. They will even get in trouble if they accept cash."

Carol, I did not realize this. What is an elderly person with Medicare to do on weekends or after hours. I guess I have taken my health insurance for granted.

jan said...

Solar, I love the joke about medicare. I am still LOL

jan said...

Carol, You are probably so right about your SF and him being depressed now. Its a holiday.

Ivy Green said...

I still haven't had a hummingbird, and our weather has been "hummer perfect." Hubs knows I'm concerned and is exploiting the opportunity for humor. He has been hanging out with my brothers too much.

"Hey, Hon! That little black and yellow bird on the feeder...is that a hummingbird (heh-heh)?"

Ivy Green said...

A lady opened her refrigerator and saw a rabbit sitting on one of the shelves.
"What are you doing in there?" She asked.

The rabbit replied:
"This is a Westinghouse, isn't it?",
To which the lady replied "Yes."
"Well," the rabbit said,

"I'm westing."

Carol said...

I'm sorry Ivy. Tell hubs to lay off.

Jan, holidays were never special to my SF. He's been somewhat morose all his life. He loved his land and farming, other than that, ehh. Never had a hobby. Never had the desire to do anything else. Now that he's too old to farm, he doesn't have anything left to live for. He really wants to be dead. That attitude doesn't attract many people to him.

Carol said...

Cute Ivy.

Ivy Green said...

I liked Solar's medicare joke too. I'm going to send it to my mom and "the sisters."

Ivy Green said...

Carol,
Hubs gave me a big hand today with a cleaning project. Plus, he made steaks for dinner. So I will let him have his little hummingbird joke. lol

Ivy Green said...

Carol,
I see those "flowering weeds" growing all over the place around here, mainly wild by the road. I never knew it's wisteria until you posted your i.d. photos. That's what you mean by learning all kinds of new and useful things on this blog.

jan said...

Carol, It is no wonder that the highest suicide rate is among elderly white males.

John did some chaplain work for an assisted living facility. He was most concerned about some of the white men who felt they had nothing left to live for. Most of these were widowed or single. Not so for the women. They got involved in all kinds of activities and with other people.

Ivy Green said...

Another "weed" growing wild in my yard that I tried to eradicate turned out to be the Oak Leaf Hydrangea - the State Wildflower of Alabama. I was such a "damn Yankee" when I first got here. My friends have stamped that out of me. lol

Alabama State Wildflower

Ivy Green said...

Carol and Jan,
S.F. sounds like a sad situation, but it also sounds like he a does a reasonable job of caring for himself...in spite of his phone calls to you, Carol.
Bear Woman's Dad went down that path until he started mixing up his days and nights and calling her at all hours of the night. Is SF doing that with you?

Carol said...

My SF couldn't wait for mom to die. He seriously thought that he could get some 20 year old chic. Really. He has no personality. I think a good bit of his depression is because he can't get some young chic to go wait on him.

I liked him a lot more before I had to spend a year living with him while taking care of mom. After that year, I really started to dislike him.

Ivy Green said...

I suppose I was more of a "dumb Yankee." The other kind, well, I don't think we are allowed to overcome that. lol

Ivy Green said...

Carol,
I really think it would be okay for you to let somebody else worry about him and take his calls. You have paid your dues on that. How long has your Mom been gone? The statute of limitations is up.

Carol said...

Enough depressing stuff.

I invited my two husbands from next door and river rat Randel to the BBQ also. I got out enough meat, I think, for the entire neighborhood. When I BBQ, I don't really eat that much and I always have too much left over.

I went out to start up the pontoon boat and it sounded funny. I knew it wasn't a good sign. A bolt holding the spring on top of the starter jumped off. I couldn't find it anywhere and it should have been somewhere within that motor because the motor cover should have kept it in. I wonder if someone else came by and borrowed that part. I can't get another one except at a boat place. None were open by the time I tried to start the boat. Dang it, just when I have the opportunity to use the boat, it's broke.

I'll have to get rr Randel to bring over his pontoon. Got to take everyone for a cruise and actually rr Randel is a hoot to cruise with. You guys would really like him. Very spiritual, nutty guy. He'll find some quiet scenic spot and we'll stop for a moment of meditation and to listen to the harmony of the river creatures.

I told ya'll about the time he made us all come up with an indian name. Mine was Running Scared. He well understood the significance of my choice since he does like to often exploit it. He waits until we are half way between no where and no where else and he will tell me he forgot to check on how much gas he had left. When I give him my frightened look, he's smiling.

Carol said...

He once did run out of gas, in his pontoon boat, and without a paddle. He had to paddle back to his place with a crab net. thank God I wasn't with him. That must have been a sight. When I go out with him, I have a safety check list I go over with him. Gas, paddles, life jackets.....

Ivy Green said...

I just discovered Hubs sneaked a surprise into the freezer. Blue Bell Peaches and Homemade Vanilla...!

Ivy Green said...

Carol,

"...the harmony of the river creatures."

I like the audio-visual image that conjures up.

Carol said...

I just stepped outside on my porch for a moment. I heard some splashing. I shot my big flashlight over to the area thinking it might be my ducks. I saw some big fish going after some bugs or bait fish. Just past that area, a couple of camps down there is this big light, high up in a tree. There was an huge owl going after the bugs that the light attracts. Never a dull moment outside around here. But, I haven't heard "the sound" for a while now.

Ivy Green said...

I loved "Big Fish," the movie with Ewan MacGregor. The author of the book ("Big Fish: A Novel of Mythic Proportions") graduated from Miss College's school. She has signed copies of several of his works on her book shelf from when he visited as a guest lecturer. I guess I better borrow them quick before she moves 'em to Oregon. I have never been a fan of "fantasy" genre until now with the "Wicked" series.

Daniel Wallace's "Big Fish"

thornwil said...

The only person Bob (our stepfather) will call is Carol. I'll call him and he just won't answer the phone. Carol can call right after me and he answers. The last few times I called he has answered the phone and when I ask him how he's doing, he says "fine". I have told him to call me if he needs anything but he won't.
Carol has even told him off more than once and he still likes her the most. Some of it may have to do with his dementia.

thornwil said...

I just re-read my comment and I didn't really mean Carol told Bob off. She was just very honest with Bob about some matters, which she needed to be.

Ivy Green said...

Mary,
Do you want to hear any feedback on your comment, or were you just letting us know? I think Carol has heard enough from me about it, but I don't want to ignore you. Those were good observations you made about Bob's behavior. He is smarter than he lets on.

jan said...

Carol, I have kind of held back from saying anything. I am not sure what you want from us right now. I do think that it is good that you can express your feelings about Bob and how his actions are affecting you right now.

Carol said...

You got it Ivy. Bob is a crafty old bugger. We did do a lot of bonding over the years. I rode the range with him, he really didn't have to talk, I just enjoyed the scenery. I pretended I was one of the explorers of the new frontier. I had a good imagination.

I worked the fields, drove a combine, or tried to, picked up hay, helped build and run the crawfish pond, went to cow meetings. I was the son he never had. That's why he took a shine to me. I loved being on the farm.

I really blamed mom for the problems they had. It's kind of the way our family is/was. Mom started it. We always thought that any problems in relationships we had must be our problem instead of the spouse or partner.

I really got a good look at Bob, from more of mom's point of view when I had to live with them. It opened my eyes. At times I really hated him, especially the afternoon of my mom's memorial when he was laughing and talking about some woman who was on the church trip with him who had the hots for him. A delusion. I think I told him off in front of his sister that day. I think she may have felt I needed to. She did have some couth.

Carol said...

I'm feeling guilty Jan. That's why I confess my sins of not wanting to take care of his old ass. I'm hoping for your absolution. Is that how you spell it?

Carol said...

Everyone, family and friends, knows my tendency for feeling guilty, and believe me, do they use it.

Ivy Green said...

That's a big story, Carol (and Mary). We could probably do a "case study" of Bob's personality and temperament. I think a few of us have experience with "master manipulators." But really, the focus should be on you, not him. You can remember the "good times" you spent with him, but also realize that he has made his own path and you are not responsible for that (or him.)

My feedback is "unsolicited." I like Jan's approach better...letting you let us know what you need from us even if it's just a sounding board. Just let us know...we can do a little or we can do a lot. lol

Carol said...

Does that mean I'm absolved?

Carol said...

Know any Latin?

Carol said...

You may have to mutter a few Latin words to make it official. Maybe some Spanish would be good enough.

Ivy Green said...

Carol,
My Latin is as good as my Hebrew. However, I remember you can get absolution from confession, but you can't plan to continue "sinning." lol

Ivy Green said...

Carol,
You're gonna have to let go of that guilt...

Carol said...

I think you must have to be Catholic for confession to actually work. I dropped out of my Catholic schooling classes when I found out the lady teaching the class was doing a Novena to get George Bush elected the second time. That was the final straw. I was actually doing it for my SF even though he didn't ask me to. I'm glad I woke up in time.

Carol said...

Well, it's time for bed. I have to get up early and hit those pots, pans and pit. Lots of cooking to do.

Carol said...

I made my BBQ sauce yesterday and it simmered all day. Now the flavors are getting married in the frig.

A hard day of cooking. It's a good way to work off guilt.

Ivy Green said...

Carol,
You do not have to be Catholic for confession to work or even be heard. A Catholic priest can hear anyone's confession who's willing to make it and can absolve sins. I just recently heard of such a true story from the person who did it. I wouldn't otherwise have believed it.

jan said...

Carol,
Go and feel no more guilt. You have done much more than anyone needs to do for your SF. That was a shitty thing he did at your mother's funeral. I think he was being completely insensitive to your's, Mary's and your other sister's feelings.

Ivy Green said...

Jan,
Amen to that.

Solar said...

Carol,

Take it from someone that gives more than he gets back, and thats the way that I want it, and always will....U R the same...at some point reciprocity must happen from others, even by family in order to keep giving, if he would just smile and tell you that he is proud of u, or that he loves u or something like that, it would move U...u had enough thats all, and now that U have found the peace that your cabin give u..u are feeling a little guilty for not wanting to put that dream in danger...he is smart, but not very giving.....no worries mate.! Ur doing the right thing...the guilt part will go away when U see this...imo

Just to help u one more for the road..joke,been telling the same ones here and at tm..u pinks here are a better crowd to make laugh tho....


A guy is walking down the street and sees Little Solar smoking a cigarette.
He says, "Kid, you're too young to smoke."
Solar looks up but doesn't say anything.

The man asks, "Son, how old are you?"
Little Solar says, "Six."

Stunned, the man says, "Six!? When did you start smoking?"
Solar replies, "Right after the first time I had sex."
"Right after the first time you had sex? When was that?"
Little Solar answers, "I don't remember. I was to drunk."

later.

jan said...

Carol, enjoy your day tomorrow. I know cooking will help you feel better.

Happy day to everyone tomorrow.
Goodnight

jan said...

Solar, OMY, what a story - LOL

jan said...

I meant OMG

Carol said...

Another good one Little Solar. See ya'll manana. Thanks for being my friends.

Carol said...

Hey, since Jan absolved me and she's married to a Priest, I think it's official or close enough.

Carol said...

And Jan, my SF didn't have a clue how inappropriate he was being when he said that right after mom's memorial. It wasn't any dementia either. It's his Assburger's. Mispelling intended.

Carol said...

OK, I've been awake now for an hour. Went to bed with this little work related crisis and then I was awaken by it also.

I have this little woman who was sentenced to 45 days and she happenes to be about 7 months pregnant and has some fairly significant mental health diagnoses. She smart as a whip which is often the case with some of the seriously mentally ill. She has tormented us for the entire time she has been encarcerated. I've done the sentence, along with a good many others in the jail and the community. She, on the other hand, has been quite entertained.

She has spent most of her time in the hospital because she knows how to play the game. Can't take her psych drugs while pregnant or at least no one will prescribe them. It's way beyond my scope and the psych and OB, that have seen her, won't prescribe them either

I was awakened last night to send her to the hospital and again at 4a because the hospital we use for OB doesn't want her and the one they sent her to after that doesn't either. Everyone is aggravated by everyone else and of course, that means I get the most aggravation.

Carol said...

Actually, I didn't post that comment until I pealed and started the potatoes and marinated my meat.

Chloe said...

I don't know how you do it Carol. I couldn't handle that kind of stress, or deal with some of the people you have to deal with on a daily basis.

Chloe said...

Carol, I agree with the others that your post and picture of Maggie with her bunny being perfect for Easter morning - just change the title like Coreen says. I'm going to try to get those pics of Emma when she digs into her basket this morning, but I don't know how the days going to go yet. It may consume a lot of my time (?). I'm hoping to find time to sit down at my computer for a decent amount of time (which is always so important to me), but I just don't know yet.

Keep us informed how your barbecue goes today - I hope you enjoy having your SF over. (Will Mary be there too?). It's really nice that his friends are going to be there too.

I'm looking forward to hearing about how the rest of y'all's day goes too.

Chloe said...

I haven't seen any hummers yet either, but there sure are plenty of other birds. I didn't realize that birds were so noisy before daylight. I love it.

Chloe said...

Carol, I hadn't read all the comments - I see you're going to have a lot of people. Now I know you'll have fun. Good!

Coreen said...

Hope the day will only improve for you Carol...

Sometime, the act of doing things, displaces
negative feelings...so I hope that preparing
your Easter meal will help...and pretty sure
in any case, it will give you, your family & friends a great dinner...

Hope everyone gets to enjoy the day...even if
you don't celebrate Easter, it also signifies
the idea of spring...rebirth, new beginnings...

Happy Easter....

Carol said...

Oh, but I do celebrate Easter Coreen. Maybe not by going to church services in a official church but I do here at the Church of the Big River. I've already sung a round of "Christ the Lord Has Risen Today..." I'm a fan of Jesus and the gang. And the gang is all here.

Carol said...

The ducks, squirrels, birds and I shared a sunrise service.

Coreen said...

Carol,

I did not intend to imply that you did not, only to acknowledge that others may not celebrate/observe this day as such.

As far as an Easter post, if you would like a more traditional one, I will put one up a little later this morning & maybe that will give Chloe some more time to do what she needs
to today before she has the chance to to post any pics she wants to share...

Carol said...

I was kind of hoping you would Coreen and kept checking the post area to see if anything was evolving.

Chloe said...

"Hope everyone gets to enjoy the day...even if you don't celebrate Easter, it also signifies the idea of spring...rebirth, new beginnings..."

Beautifully said Coreen.
We always celebrate 'all' the holidays her also.

Coreen said...

Just came in from getting the papers, feeding the birds, the morning started foggy, but now
the sun has come out & it is going to be another beautiful spring day...

And Carol, I will have a post up in a little
bit...just didn't want to intrude on what I
thought were some great pics of Maggie & your
neighborhood & an excellent tribute to both
Easter and springtime. I am fascinated by that
spanish moss that hangs on trees only in the South...

Carol said...

I think the women in Jesus's life would insist that we do a blog post for him today. Remember Mary M, was the first to see him risen and since my Maggie was named after her she also feels the need for one.

Coreen said...

A new post is up....

Semen Rendi said...
This comment has been removed by the author.